FYI

I've been told it's easy to check if I'm getting a bit snookered: Apparently I speak with an American accent after a few.

It's a bit worrying as there's usually someone asking me if I'm American [or Canadian] - and I'm not always drunk!

Boyfriend...

...is working the weekend. Friday was all right. Yesterday was a bore. Today is absolutely horribly boring - and it's not even gone noon yet!

Perhaps I could cheer up a bit by having a stroll through town? Probably not but the weather is nice so I think I'll sit by the Peace Gardens and read.

Entertain me!!!

UPDATE:
Have now been to town and back. Sat in the sun and relaxed - it was great. Especially as there was this adorable girl (about 4yrs old) who was dressed as a pirate with complimentary sword, hook and hat. She went around saying "Argh Argh, matey". She was such a sweetheart. I want one!

Also bout some plums, the yellow ones were a rip off as they taste of water. The blue are sweet and really tasty. The fact that my stomach disagrees with plums is a different matter. I'm at home now so if I got to go - I can.

Oh my II!

Boyfriend and I watched "Sex Change Hospital" last night. Oh My God *using my Janice voice here*! First of all, the Doctor performing the surgery has gone through the procedure herself and I would never, ever, have guessed that she used to be a man!

Anyway, the man was in his 50's and he had awesome support from his dad who was really happy to get a daughter and came in with a "happy Birthday" card after the surgery saying; "This is your second birth and I am so proud of you!". I would not have guessed that a man his age would accept it as easily as he'd done. Brilliant!

Boyfriend cringed and kept his legs together tightly when it was time for the "snippety snip" part - and they showed e v e r y t h i n g! It was kind of gross but more in a I'm-not-a-doctor-and-I'm-not-sure-I-needed-to-see-that kind of way as I don't have the same "closeness" to those body parts as Boyfriend. Boyfriend looked a bit faint at one point but to him, that would be his worst nightmare and to me? Well, I got some insight in "how to" in case Boyfriend misbehaves... and that's all I'm going to say about that!

It was interesting but I'm not sure I'll keep an eye out for the next episode...

Oh my!

Am so in need to lose weight. Just seen some pictures of me from one of the recent nights out. One picture is def. a nightmare.

Mental note; stand a bit to the side when having your picture taken. Black, in this case, is not slimming. Do not push breast out as they'll look humongous. try to keep eyelids at equal heights or you'll look like a crackhead. Smile nicely not crazily. Use powder to get the shine off nose. Do not drink after 22.00. Suck it in!!! or if all the above fails - hide in the loo.

Oh dear oh dear....

Last night and today

Went to T&A's house last night for a cocktail party and I brought the cake I'd made. T was already hammered so the cocktails he made had not been measured whatsoever. I don't know what was in mine but it tasted like Bacardifilled vomit so I drank it bit by bit until I was able to discretely dispose of it -in Boyfriend's glass- and the got onto a bit of bubbly instead. Due to T's inability to measure his drinks we were all pretty snookered when we stumbled into the cabs... S hid her drink from the cabbie and finished it during the ride - I think she's a brave woman for actually drinking all of it. The winebar was good fun, it was an open bar for the Medics and I was sort of allowed to get in on it as Medics got drinks for me.

I had quite a few Absolut Raspberry with orangejuice - the 4th one was taken away from me and Boyfriend finished it to make sure I didn't get too drunk to get into the club. The Leadmill was an absolute riot, haven't danced for ages so I went wild -dancing and hopping around with various Medics and Dentists. I tried to explain the Magic Wand to the dentists but they didn't get it as they're a bit behind in modern [dental] equipment here in the UK.

Anyway, it was apparently a very good night as I have no recollection of getting into bed with Boyfriend.
Me: "When did you get to bed last night?"
Boyfriend: "At the same time as you, pisshead! You asked me to take your bra off, remember?"
Me: "Did I? How funny! Wait a minute, I've still got my bra on, and it's left imprints!"
Boyfriend: "Yeah, couldn't be arsed flipping you over to get to the hooks so I just left it."
Me: "Thanks for being nice, you lazy shit. Hey, you've still got your socks on, soooo not sexy!"
Boyfriend: "Oh, yeah? You're right! Fancy that. Now move over so I can have some duvet..."
Me (rolled up in the duvet): "Ooooo, I'm cocooned!"
Boyfriend: "Are you still drunk?"

And after that affectionate chat we shared a couple of Paracetamol's and slept for another 2 hours. The tap water is fantastically tasty today. I wonder why...

The Continental Market

is back in town! YEAY! Pretty French "cheese" guy is here and he recognised me but that is probably because I correct him when he calls me "madame" to "mademoiselle" and that makes him laugh -he's got a very nice smile. They didn't have the nice Creamy Brie which we devoured last time so I ended up with a 'new' cheese that he recommended.

I also bought a new plant for our balcony, pretty pretty. The plant guy (not Dutch) said I only need to replant it if I want it to grow massive -which I don't - so that was also a good buy. £5 for a big pretty plant! Bargain! Of course it was all with Boyfriend's money which makes me even happier!

Am back now as I have to make another cake for Boyfriend to bring in to work tomorrow, it's his last day and he said he'd get in the good books. And I don't mind as the other one came out pretty good - have not decorated it properly yet - and it was quite good fun so.... I should do something to earn my keep - apart from spending his money. Ahem...

Gotta go. Take care and I hope it isn't raining wherever you are!

Inmate Musical...

Found this on YouTube and we (Boyfriend and I) laughed until we pulled all our stomach muscles. Brilliant recreation stuff, it must keep the trouble down to a minimum. One example of how naive I am: I was a bit confused to how they could let a girl in among so many male prisoners. And then I saw a close-up...duh!

Alternative titles:

• I thought they'd cleared MJ?
• Less scary than MJ despite being in prison.
• Blame it on the Boogie?
• Jailhouse Rock
  

Please post a comment if you can think of some more....

Harry Potter and the Electrical Whisk

Hmm - the title could work as a HP title, one where he tackles domestic appliances but sadly strangles himself to death by the cord to the electrical whisk...

Will not need to read the new Harry Potter - got on wikipedia where there was a summary + a list of who will die and by whom. Brilliant. Have not read book 5 or 6 anyway so this won't make much difference. Will watch the movies though - kind of like Alan Rickman, alot, so that makes up for some of the other less interesting/good actors and actresses. I know I know, I'm harsh but you see - I have watched a lot of movies (mostly due to insomnia in my teens) and I know what I like and I do not necessarily think that everyone who ends up on the big screen deserves it. But that is Sod's Law, I guess.

Anyhooo, had a look in town for something to wear. I don't know exactly what it is until I see it/try it. I did not find it but I bought an electrical whisk as I am baking a cake (a 3 layer one) for Thursday. Got an awesome recipe from my mom "Even you can't fail with this one.." You'd think she was unnecessarily harsh but trust me she isn't.

I can cook 5 course dinners and make various rather strange desserts. I can even rustle something up for 25 people when the power's out (it's happened!) BUT, I cannot, to save my life (or anyone else's), bake an angel cake/sponge cake (sockerkaka in Swedish). They just die on their arses and are completely runied. My dad loves me trying though as he get to eat whatever's wrong. So you can say my dad is happy when I fail, in the nicest sort of way and without being nasty about it. It usually ends with me screaming in frustration and just dumping it all in the sink, letting the dog/s lick the bowl and then sulk for the rest of the day while mom saves me by making the most perfect cake ever...

This time, however, will be different as there are only 3 ingredients and all I need to do is to beat the eggs and sugar until it's really fluffy which is at least 20 minutes - hence the need to purchase an electrical whisk. I am not strong nor patient enough to do it by hand... I hope it'll work but as we say in Sweden:

"Don't shout hello until you've crossed the stream.." (meaning you will probably fall in if you're too cocky about clearing it...)

A bird is a bird is a bird...?

We live by the river (hence the flooding a month ago) and there are birds swimming up and down, much to my amusement as living in the city sort of limits the number of 'wild' animals to watch. I'm a country girl so I appreciate animals and wildlife and find it fairly odd that I've managed to find a Boyfriend who is so clueless about animals. I mean, he hadn't even been close enough to a horse to pet it before he met my Maja (picture to the right).

Sometimes we go for a walk along the river and I usually go all gooey over the cute ducks swimming - I just love the male ducks with little curly feathers on their butts. Anyway, initially I was fairly patient in explaining that "that is a male duck and the one over there is a female.." etc etc. But after a while it started to piss me off. How is is possible that an intelligent, well educated man who claims to be from a small town by the sea, is so completely ignorant when it comes to recognise birds? And we're not even talking about tiny birds that look very similar -I'd have trouble doing so - we're talking ducks, geese and swans!

One time he pointed at a bird and asked "is that a duck?". It was so obvious that it was so I said, jokingly; "No, that is a short-necked swan!" He then goes "oh, right!" and walks on leaving me gobsmacked...

I shouldn't blame him however as his parents cannot see the difference between geese and swans. Boyfriend and I were walking along the harbour in his hometown and there was a swan in the water and I commented on how they mate for life, bla bla bla. After a turn we encountered some geese walking along and he said; "I thought you said swans were territorial but there are 4big ones walking along together just fine.." He then refused to believe that they were geese so we asked his mom when she came to pick us up but she also claimed them to be swans which made it 2 to 1 in their favour... 'Brilliant'! I just gave up.

During the time I was in Sweden Boyfriend's parents came down to see him and they got on to the subject of geese and swans. Boyfriend's dad also thought the geese outside our flat were swans. Boyfriend then realised that they ought to look it up as he knew I'd be livid if they couldn't spot the difference so they went on to Google Images:

Lo and behold - Ems, the blonde Swede was right! But I do think that they still believe that geese are swans if they see them...

Am I horrible for thinking it is obvious which is which?

Is this who I am?

Hmmm - I thought I was a bit smarter, and I do get irritated fairly easy + My bedroom used to be a mess growing up but now I'm more a cross between Bree in Desperate Housewives and Monica and friends, so that's true, I guess. All in all it looks as if I'm a "down the middle kind of gal" and that seems a bit boring... Might start dying my hair black and scream when people get near me and mumble things about death being imminent - but even that is not very individualistic, is it?

Advanced Global Personality Test Results Extraversion |||||||||||||| 53% Stability |||||||||||||| 60% Orderliness |||||||||||||| 56% Accommodation |||||||||||||||| 63% Interdependence |||||||||||| 43% Intellectual |||||||||||| 43% Mystical |||||||||||| 43% Artistic |||||| 23% Religious |||||||||| 36% Hedonism |||||| 30% Materialism |||||||||||| 50% Narcissism |||||||||||||| 56% Adventurousness |||||||||||||| 56% Work ethic |||||||||||||||| 63% Self absorbed |||||||||||| 43% Conflict seeking |||||||||||||||| 63% Need to dominate |||||||||||||| 56% Romantic |||||||||||||||||| 76% Avoidant |||||||||||| 50% Anti-authority |||||||||||||| 56% Wealth |||||||||||||||| 70% Dependency |||||| 23% Change averse |||||||||||||| 56% Cautiousness |||||||||||| 50% Individuality |||||||||| 36% Sexuality |||||||||||||||||| 76% Peter pan complex |||||||||| 36% Physical security |||||||||||||||||||| 90% Physical Fitness |||||||||| 37% Histrionic |||||||||||||||| 70% Paranoia |||||||||||| 43% Vanity |||||||||| 36% Hypersensitivity |||||||||||| 50% Indie |||||||||||| 48%

Take Free Advanced Global Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

Stability results were moderately high which suggests you are relaxed, calm, secure, and optimistic.

Orderliness results were moderately high which suggests you are, at times, overly organized, reliable, neat, and hard working at the expense of flexibility, efficiency, spontaneity, and fun.

Extraversion results were medium which suggests you are moderately talkative, outgoing, sociable and interacting.

Trait snapshot:
rarely irritated, positive, tough, non phobic, fearless, likes the unknown, self reliant, high self control, confident, trusting, strong instincts, prudent, optimistic, willful, likes parties, prefers a specialized career, takes charge, altruistic, strong, high self concept, adventurous, practical, thoughtful

a sense of defeat...

I'm older today than I was yesterday...

Food blogs and memories

it must have been a tiny "day after" as I am fine fine fine now. I'm very grateful for that! Been messing around on the internet and found a few new blogs that I like - food blogs.

I want to share the fact that I've found an awesome and funny site about the above mentioned subject - food. Ms Glaze is funny and it's actually really interesting to read about what she does. I think she --unless it's already a done deal-- will be snapped up by some tv-channel to do a show any time soon so make sure you remember where you heard it first. Make sure you watch her stuff sausages. Brilliant!

Me and my sister used to stuff sausages with our mormor* when we were kids and I remember having an awesome time. Mormor was a very proper lady but with a wicked sense of humour and I'm sure she would have said all the same things if we'd been a little but older. In fact, she might have done so but we were probably a bit too young to realise it...




*Mormor is the Swedish word for maternal grandmother.

Guess what I did?

Beer and wine makes you feel fine.
Wine and beer makes you feel queer.
Wine, beer and liquor makes you sicker...

shoe trouble

Had to phone Miss E (in Gothenburg) to ask what shoes to wear tonight. She was right - as always when it comes to me and what to wear.

Thanks Miss E and have a great time on (in?) Cyprus - be nice to 'da boyz'.

Aaaargh!!!

Empty loo roll not replaced with a new one... This is discovered after.

Boyfriend is in trouble. I think he must like being in the doghouse...

'Nuff said!

Shopping and bad 'folders'...

Boyfriend and I had an outing yesterday. (No, neither of us came out of the closet, it was not that sort of outing so we're firmly staying out right where we are.) We hopped on the train to Leeds. Cost almost nothing and took almost no time - I don't know why I haven't done that before! Will do now though.

It's a nice city, bigger than Sheffield and looks a bit better too. There are less of those "what were the architects thinking" kind of buildings and more stylish [old] ones... Shopping's good as well but that may be cos it's a new place. I loved their market place though - butchers, fishmongers, fruit and flower stands. Wish they had something like that here rather than Castle Market - yuck!

I wasn't in the mood for shopping though and I blame my cold for that. Had to blow my nose every 10 steps so at times I just felt like sitting down on the pavement and never to walk again. But I didn't. Boyfriend went crazy as he doesn't really need any new stuff other than a pair of brown shoes. His closet (without him in it) is bulging and I fear it may break one of these days! He got 2 new pairs of trousers - really nice - and 2 new shirts - super nice - but my God is he slow in the changing rooms! I felt the years pass by.

What really annoys me (among many things but this one particular during yesterdays shopping) is when the cashiers cannot (will not?) fold the clothes properly before putting them in a bag. This girl just sort of rolled them up and shoved them in a bag when she ought to have used 2! This may seem like a stupid thing to get annoyed by - people are starving and dying in the world - but it did annoy the heck out of me and I just walked away. This "walking away" business proves I wasn't feeling very well. If I had been my normal self I most surely would have told her to redo it. I'm a bitch. I know. But I didn't ask for creased clothes. If I had wanted creased clothes I would have bought some. But these clothes were Boyfriend's and he didn't seem to mind as long as I kept calm so I guess the girl will go on working and just shoving other people's clothes in too small bags. She's on my "don't like" list and will probably stay there forever! I'm a sad petty girl...

Confused

Watched the news about the guy who decided to swim in the Arctic to raise awareness about Global Warming. Nice guy! Nice to see people take a stand and I, for one, am impressed by his performance as I fell through the ice once and it was cooooold! And I didn't stay in long enough to swim about.

But here's where I get a tiny bit confused. The guy is out to raise the issue of GW - that much I get - and he is going to do this, not only by swimming in freezing water, but also by travelling the world and talk about it. Hmmm...

Is he going to swim to all these places? Or is he going to hop on a plane spewing out not such good stuff?

And what is he going to talk about? That it was freezing cold? People may not be the best at recycling and just dumb in general but I do think we can give them the credit of knowing that swimming in the Arctic isn't going to be like sitting in a hot tub.

Wouldn't it be better - with today's advanced technology - to have video conferences? I know the impact won't be as striking but still... Fighting fire with fire is good in a lot of cases (fires) but is it really the best thing in a case like this?

I know I fly more than some but I recycle loads and my parents have a forest where we (re)plant trees every now and then so that ought to count for something.

But I still don't get Mr Arctic Swimmer.

You know you've been away too long when...

... you can't find the spare loo tissue.
...when British commercial breaks are exciting!
...you use Swedish grammar when speaking English.
...you're astonished how quickly British weather change.
...you don't understand the local dialects.

... you accidentally drop the towel and it makes your boyfriend blush!

Am back inte world of the living...

Have been "away" since I got back from Germany. Been "s**t busy" with everything. My farmor turned 90 last Saturday so she had a huge party (open house) and over 40 people were there! It may seem as a tiny party but being 90 must mean that a lot of your friends are spending most of the time knocking on the Pearly Gates. My farmor seemed to pretty ok at the end of the day and I don't know how she does it cos I was effing knackered. It was good to see some relatives I haven't seen in ages - and I do mean ages!

With all that 90th partying over and done with - they do keep a knackering pace, the Oldies - I just got time to go home, pack, go to bed, wake up and get to the train that'd take me to the airport and eventually Boyfriend.

Think I'm getting air-sick though - had to concentrate on not throwing up which could have been a slight embarrassment as I was talking to a girl living in Manchester (due to her Boyfriend) and we got along well.

Anyway, the reunion with Boyfriend (we ahve spent 6 weeks apart, mind you) was a bit different to the one I had pictured. You know, dropping bags at the sight of Boyfriend, running in slow motion jumping up into his arms and there press my lips onto his and kiss, kiss, kiss for aeons while people around are applauding...

Not!

It was more like: "Hi hon! You look great and I think I'm about to throw up so we'd better get going or I might have to mop this floor..." A bit of a kiss and then basically dashing out for some air while he went to pay the parking. Not to mention that I would have crushed Boyfriend if trying to jump into his arms. And I sort of needed him to drive the car so all that was out of the question. But one day - and 10 kilos lighter...

Car-sick! So we didn't go through Snake Pass (no description of road needed - name says it all) which meant that journey home took a bit longer. I fell asleep to try and stifle the vomiting-reflex.

Aaaahhh! Love! ain't it grand?

Mini Break

So, spent the last 4 days in Lübeck. It was quite nice actually. A very pretty city with loads of history. Was a bit starnge to walk around and think that it was bombed to shreds during WWII. My sister's "grandfather-in-law" tagged along to have a look at his old home-town and he was a great guide!

Food was ok too, not just bratwursts so I found some stuff I fancied...

Felt a bit lonely as Boyfriend wasn't with us so that sucked a bit but I lived through it. An emergency helicopter landed in the middle of the city and one of the most gorgeous medics (not counting Boyfriend- obviously) stepped out and that made my day a little bit brighter... Don't know what they needed to land in the city for but it was a lovely sight!

Am back home now and I really longed for a long chat with Boyfriend before his on-call starts at 9 tonight but there was no answer. Have been fobbed off for a bloody game of footie. Guess it shows how much he's missed me... He'll pay for that, I promise!

Will write a bit more cheerful next time - am beat after a day in the car.

Silence...

I'll be quiet for a few days as my family and I are escaping my dad's 60th birthday. He doesn't want to be celebrated so decided to do a runner...

I hope it'll be fun.

cheerio!

My grandmother...

...is turning 90 in 1 week and she's awesome, I love her to bits. She's still living on her own despite various broken bones and heartattacks in the past year but her hearing is a thing of the past. She's got 2 hearingaids but still... it can be a struggle to have a 2way conversation.

I'd just like to share something that I find hilarious as well as sweet and a bit sad. A weird combination but it works. The conversation took place yesterday when I was painting her house (or a bit of it) and I was looking for the new paintbrushes that I'd misplaced somewhere...

Me (fairly loud): Have you seen the new paintbrushes, farmor*?
Farmor: hmmm??
Me (very loud): HAVE YOU SEEN THE PAINTBRUSHES?
Farmor: What? Have you bought catfood?
Me: ??!!
----
Bless her.

I still can't find the paintbrushes...


* Farmor is the Swedish word for paternal grandmother

Dentist and Blonde Childbirth

I had to go an visit the dentist - again -today. And once more they used the Magic Wand on me. I wasn't as worried this time so perhaps Boyfriend is in for a treat?

ahem - anyways... I seem to be one of those strange people who doesn't really react to anesthetics. That's not a lot of fun. They injected it/me once... waited.... Iwas numb but could still feel a lot of pain. They injected another shot of whatever it is they use... and waited... and it was still as painful.

The nurse and dentist then discussed whether I should have a third injection. At this point I wasn't too bothered as I'd already had 2 needles inserted so a third would have been ok but apparently a third wasn't "advised".

They finished sorting it out and then let me go with a cheerful: "It might be good to let people know you're one of those weird ones who'll need more anesthetics than usual... especially if you're planning on childbirth."

Childbirth?!

Am I missing something? Please don't tell me they come out of the mouth nowadays. I haven't even come to terms with the old-fashioned entrance/exit...

I need to talk to Boyfriend. He should know. He's a doctor... I knew I should have paid more attention in school. Holy shit and Godly sandals, I'm scared now!

Tag, you're it

Realised that I'd been tagged ages ago but never gotten around to post it... Here it is:

Three Things About Me

Three screen names that you’ve had: Emzi, Polly-Esther, I must be boring but those are the only ones I've had...

Three things you like about yourself: My knockers (I have a very nice set, according to Boyfriend), my evil sense of humour, I take good care of my animals (have none at the mo - but in my imagination I have a horse, a dog and a puffer-fish and they're all in excellent health!).

Three things you don’t like about yourself: The size of my ass, my tendency to be a nagging whiny-ass beyotch, my hair isn't as blonde as it used to be.

Three parts of your heritage: Stubbornness from both granddads, I know my way around a farm, and a little bit more stubbornness, whee!

Three things that scare you: The idea that Intelligent Design may actually be taught as the only [a scientific] theory in some schools, cave exploring with flesh eating creatures stalking me (The Descent scared the shit out of me), being chased by a Black Mamba through the African bush.

Three of your everyday essentials: BBC Breakfast, Rix MorronZoo, checking my favourite blogs

Three things you are wearing right now: A pair of severly-out-of-fashion jeans; a grey t-shirt with pink print; shabby, smelly old slippers. I am a FASHIONISTA.

Three of your favorite songs: That depends on my mood, but for right now: Li'l Kims “How Many Licks?”, “Portugal” by Christian Kjellvander, “Jag Väntar” by Sofia Karlsson (this song gives me the chills no matter how many times I listen to it)

Three things you want in a relationship: fidelity, good sex, being similar in the ways that really count

Two truths and a lie: I've eaten razor clams and loved it, I've eaten scallops and loved it, I've eaten breadfruit and loved it

Three things you can’t live without: food, animals and books

Three places you want to go on vacation: Samoa; Papua New guinea; Alaska

Three things you just can’t do: Wolf whistle, spit properly, speak Turkish

Three kids names: I'munique; Moxie Crimefighter; Charlize Angel.

Three things you want to do before you die: learn how to sail; become a princess; have more laughs than frowns.

Three celeb crushes: Patric Dempsey, Colin Firth, Robert Duvall

Three of your favorite musicians: Again, this changes from day to day, but high on the list right now are The Twilight Sad, Sugababes and Dolly Parton.

Three physical things about the opposite sex that appeal to you: soft hands (hands used to hard work can be surprisingly soft), brown eyes, legs (footballer's legs).

Three of your favorite hobbies: Reading, riding, messing around on the Internet

Three things you really want to do badly right now: Walk into town, find the pair of jeans, have lunch - I'm hungry

Three careers you’re considering/you’ve considered: Writer, rich bitch, veterinarian

Three ways that you are stereotypically a boy: I laugh at fart jokes; if you ever see me looking off thoughtfully into the distance, odds are high that I’m not pondering the meaning of life so much as imagining some filthy, dirty, wrong sex; I'd really like getting mucky playing in the dirt without getting into trouble with mom for having dirty clothes.

Three ways that you are stereotypically a girl: I love chick lit, I have a passion for girly clothing and shoes, I love getting even or planning nasty revenge stunts.

The Magic Wand

I forgot to mention the totally inappropriate joke I cracked at the dentist's earlier today. It was about the machine that "delivered" the anesthetics. The dentist and the nurse both laughed though but it could ahve gone horribly wrong:

Dentist: You don't have to worry. This is something new and it's almost painless. it'll take a while but it won't hurt. All you need to do is open your mouth. They don't call it the Magic Wand for nothing..
Me (surly): That's what Boyfriend calls it as well but I still refuse to put it in my mouth... eh
Me (thinking):.......fuuuuuuuuck!

Pain

Just got back from the dentist's office. It hurts.

Those who know me know that there are some things I don't like such as worms, pigeons, backhair, needles (the ones the doctors give you) and dentists.

Dentists, all perfectly nice in private - at least the 2 I know privately - but I have a theory that they transform the minute they step into that dungeon of torture from respectable citizens to something that could get the most solid marble-statue to confess to various horrible things...

Nasty. Nasty.

And to top it all off; You have to pay them to do these hings to you! And it costs alot! Which brings me to a totally different question; what the hell am I paying tax for? To put someone else's snotty kids through kindergarten? Briiiilliant!

Anyway, it hurt so much that I actually agreed to try a local anesthetic! I've had it once before, when I was a kid (about 22 years ago) and they had to pull a tooth out. The needle was huge!! And since then I've done everything to stay away from dentist's needles. I have squeezed nurses hands to a pulp, I have wiggled my toes and quietly cursed every single one of them to suffer immense pain for at least a week. But it was all in vain this time, I had to get some painrelief.

I all fairness, it wasn't that bad to get the injection and they said I looked very peacefull and not afraid at all. I put it down to Yoga. Breathe in, breathe out and picture yourself in a very relaxing situation/place = Samoa, Samoa Samoa Samoa Samoa Samoa Samooooooaaaaaaaaa!

Food? Dont think so. I'll try to make mom feel sorry for me so she can make me waffles tonight. Waffles waffles waffles waffles waffles waffles... Ahhhhhh! I'll chew on the other side!