Old Ladies

...should not be allowed out on the town between 11.00 and 14.00!

Is it not amazing how such tiny little things can take up SO much space? I tried thinking positively about how close to death they are so I should let them have some fun and take up space while they can but noooo, it did not work. I simply did not have any patience at all today and found myself gripping my umbrella in preparation for a "whack" on the head if one of them stepped out of line. I managed to restrain myself but it was too close for comfort.

I think I'd better stay away from the city centre and old ladies for a while.

Filthy Animals

If you've followed my blog and/or life then you'll know that I hate pigeons. I absolutely detest the foul beasts. Anyway, Am watching Houston SPCA on Animal Planet and a pigeon hurt itself on something and was quite badly injured. And what do they do?

They operate on it (amputate its leg), have it go through extensive rehab to see if it can manage without a leg and then they send it to a foster home!!!

I am sorry, but that's a waste of money. Yes I am biased as I don't like pigeons, but would they treat a normal wild rat to the same treatment instead of putting it down?! Noooo, they would not. I'd like to use the word "hypocrisy" here.

In Which There Are Gay Characters

It seems as if there's a hysteria over 'outing' people, fictional characters, animals and who knows what else. I'm not opposed to people being gay, I don't care. Love is Love.

You like men? I like men. You like women? I like women albeit in a non-sexual way. Or does it count that I find some women absolutely stunning? In fact, I adore Sandra Bullock - she seems really nice and she's pretty. I think Ashley Cole was an absolute t*t for cheating on Cheryl Cole. I sure as hell wouldn't have cheated on such a gorgeous girl - and she too seems to be really lovely. But does it make me gay? Well, if all women looked like Sandra Bullock, Cheryl Cole and Mila Kunis, I probably would be...

As we seem to have outed everything and everyone that could be outed- we are turning our focus on various fictional characters. Moomin, Teletubbies, TinTin* etc etc. Maybe they were created to be gay and maybe they weren't. JK Rowling said Dumbledore's gay - but would we ever take a known gay character and analyse him/her and decide that certain traits are definitely 'straight' and created lengthy articles about it? How about The Wire's Omar Little? And moving on to 'real' people; I'm absolutely certain Portia Di Rossi is faking it, is she not just so straight-looking?**

I know, it doesn't do them any harm - they're fictional characters - and so what if they are gay? But if we are analysing fictional character's sexual preferences, why stick to cartoons? what about all fictional characters? There are plenty of characters that would seem 'gay' or in fact, whatever label you'd like to put on them, if only you analysed them long and hard enough. We all have traits that could be considered as 'gay'. I used to have short hair, did lots of sports, outspoken - yep, I was gay. But it all sort of disappeared when my hair grew longer and I stopped playing handball. I am now a happy heterosexual individual all thanks to my slow but steadily producing hair follicles.***

Seriously, who gives a flying rat's arse if I am gay? If TinTin is gay or if Jesus was? He did, after all, not marry, surrounded himself with male disciples, had a foot fetish and he had long hair and wore dress-like clothing, assuming most paintings are accurate. Ok, I'm sure loads of Christians might have something to say about that but in all fairness, a lot of fictional characters have been outed by various Christian congregations. 'Don't throw stones in a glasshouse' and all that comes to mind...

Maybe we should just read and read for the sake of enjoyment. Will I forbid my children to read Moomin, TinTin or Harry Potter because there are gay characters in it? No, most certainly not - but I do have a thing about brunettes - no books with brown-haired people. That's just wrong on so many levels.****


*Maybe TinTin just likes living with his uncle in a castle, hanging out with a butch captain and very bossy opera singer and maybe, just maybe he just happens to like small terriers? Did you ever think of that, huh?
**This is sarcasm
***This is also sarcasm
****Again

humorlösa chefer...

There's a good reason as to why the rest of this post will be in Swedish. Sorry about that but that's the way it'll have to be...

Jag och en kille på jobbet har ganska så lik humor så vi har rätt roligt när vi traffas. Nu jobbar vi inte alltid på samma ställe men iaf. Idag så skickade jag ett mail till honom där jag på skämt skrev att jag skulle säga upp mig om jag inte fick ledigt nästa jul.

OBS! det var ett skämt som var baserat på att jag tycker semesterplaneringen på mitt jobb suger. Detta hade man forstått om man sett den lille smajlisen som efterföljde kommentaren.

Vad händer då?? Jo, jag blir inkallad till mina 2 (!) chefer där jag måste förklara varför jag skrev som jag skrev! Jag visste inte om jag skulle skratta eller gråta när de sa att jag "minsann inte gjorde det lättare for mig själv genom att skriva så!"

Vilket jävla skämt! De är helt sanslösa! Eftersom de nu läser min mail, vill jag inte försätta mig själv än mer i klistret genom att skriva det på engelska här - precis så paranoid är jag just nu - för vem vet vad mer de läser och då ska de iaf ha besväret med att få det översatt...

*alla svordomar som finns + några till*

Do You See the Light?! - - "Hell No!"

Have to go to a workshop tomorrow morning. I am deathly worried about things like that since an acquaintance of mine went to a kick-off/workshop and they were "reborn" through an artificial birth canal as part of the exercise*. I know I wouldn't appreciate or want to do a thing like that in a room full of strangers. They'll see what stubborn is, if it is something vaguely similar tomorrow.

I've already been born once, I don't remember minding it at all and I've had a good life so I draw the conclusion that it didn't traumatise me all that much. Mind you, my mom had a caesarian, so maybe that doesn't count?

So, keep your fingers crossed that it'll just be a nice simple, non-humiliating experience tomorrow. As soon as anyone brings out a huge piece of fabric shaped like a tunnel, I'll be out the door and into the nearest pub. I don't care if it leaves me jobless...



* The place they went to had to stop doing that as some other group were less appreciative and more vocal about it than my friend's group was.

At least I'll be warm and cosy in hell

Christmas is the time of giving and an excellent opportunity in trying not to be a selfish cow.

I've bought the Big Issue - hard to say no when you've just spent x-amount on interior decorating magazines - and I've chosen some fair trade presents etc. All in all I would say that I was on a good run of becoming a Golden Child in the run up for Christmas spirit.

Until yesterday.

We stepped into a shop in search for a present for Boyfriend's sister's partner (confused? So am I). After a quick look around we realised that they didn't have what we were after so we headed back towards the escalators. And. Then. I. Saw. IT!

So pretty! So I bought it. I don't really need it as in "I'm naked and haven't got anything to put on which means I'm freezing my tail off" kind of need. But I needed it in an all together different way; I just knew it would make me happy and a better person at the same time + it was half price even though half price was more than what I would have paid for it but it somehow justified me buying it.

I'll find a charity-person with a bucket today and toss in some money. Hopefully that'll take me back up to the top of the unselfish-person list. I hope. But to be completely honest, I'm not really sure I care anyway. The coat is friggin' lovely!

A Conflict of Interests

Boyfriend insisted on watching a program about a Brazilian music movement during the 60's -and I was like; "Oh. My. God! I. Cannot. Believe. This!" So, to the computer I went.

3 minutes ago he called for me; "Hey Ems! You gotta come watch this!" He had the kind of tone in his voice that tells you something's up and I thought; "Maybe he's watching the news and something's happened?"

Yeah. Right. My Boyfriend watching the News?!

He wanted me to see Pelé play the guitar... apparently he is a singer/songwriter too.

Good for him but do I give a shit?

Oh Dear...

...England lost against Croatia in tonight's game, which means that they did not qualify for the European Cup 2008 (well, some kind of cup next summer - it's hard to remember which one as there's always another tournament on).

Now - I'm not bothered at all but Boyfriend most certainly will be traumatised by this tragic loss. I don't know the extent of damage just yet as he decided to watch it at the pub. No doubt they'll be drowning their sorrows.

I'd better go and practise on my "Oh honey, I'm soooo sorry!"-face in the mirror before he gets back and I bet he won't even comment on how much worse my cold has got - the selfish git...

I really shouldn't have ticked that box!

As part of the job introduction-thing I (we) had to sign various forms where one was about "Bird Flu Pandemic" aka "The Next Plague" aka "Mass Killer" aka "Mother Earth Kicks Ass".

Ems was in a good mood thinking "There's no way I'll still be working here when that happens..." and happily ticked the boxes to agree that "yes I can help out in the evenings and weekends if needed in case of a pandemic" as I reckoned Boyfriend would be out on the field curing the sickos anyway, leaving me home alone, and I was in the frame of mind that it wouldn't happen any time sooooon.

1 day later: BBC News Headline - Bird flu discovered on a turkey-farm in the south of England and the virus just happens to be the kind that can be transferred to people... Scary but not as scary that the story was mainly about how it'll affect people's x-mas dinner...

Give that form back - I've changed my mind! I'm not going to help people whose only concerns are whether or not they can put a fuggin' turkey on the table!
Geez!

Just to wake me up

It's been 2 days since the VMAs and does anyone really know who won what? It's just been talk about Britney's performance etc. Her performance was crap, I grant you that - and I most definitely do not want to defend her previous actions in any way (most people above the age of 3 know that you have to carry a baby using both hands as they sometimes lunge back...) but I do think that Ms Silverman crossed way over the line regarding Britney's children. However, I did like the way her so called jokes didn't really go down well with her audience and someone heckled her to get off the stage.

If only she'd been funny, then I wouldn't have said a word but was there anything substantial and remotely funny in her tirade? It was all just crude and vulgar! Some claim that everyone would have been in stitches had it been a man saying the same things but I don't think so. It was too much and if you're only able to make people laugh by attacking other people and the "weaker" one at that, the you're an utterly sad person. (In school it'd be qualified as bullying which is something we tend to forget when it comes to adults.) Why didn't she just come out and say something like "Oh Britney, Missed a few rehearsals eh?" That would have been enough and she could have left it there instead of bringing 2 innocent little kids into it all ....

Oh darn it. Once again I rant about stuff I'm not really bothered about. Oh well, it's a good way to get started in the morning...

It's so hard being a teenager...

if you didn't not the tone of sarcasm in the title then trust me, it is dripping of sarcasm. I just watched a mother talking about her concerns that her 16 year old daughter isn't getting enough quality sleep so she's tired for school (she averaged on 5 hours per night).

Listen to this: in the girl's room she had a tv, a ps2, a Nintendo DsLite, a stationary computer, a laptop, a "normal" phone, 3 mobiles and lots of cameras, microphones and other junk. No wonder she never gets to bed and she confessed to falling asleep with her cellphones on "That's why my bills are so high..."*giggle giggle giggle*

Mom, take away all those gadgets and turn off her phones during the night. And if you can't do that you'll have to be responsible for her health and poor study results. And don't use the argument that she'll have to sort herself out once at Uni so she'd better start right away. She'll be older and hopefully a bit wiser by then but if she isn't, take my advice and just save the money from her tuition fees and go on a holiday cos that mean she'll never pass anything at Uni.

Ooooh - do I really care? Nope!

Main News...

In the past few days the news have been full of that creep Pete Doherty and how he has, for the umpteenth time, been arrested with drugs and in the area of London he had been told to stay away from for a month. This is apparently something that is considered important enough to be put ahead of the more important things going on in the world. But we're supposed to care about what Pete Doherty gets up to rather than finding out whether or not they're able to rescue/find the trapped miners in Utah. Pete Doherty is news worthy in the sense that the poor thing is in trouble as it's a hard life shooting up to the extent where you don't have time to have a shower or have any regards for personal hygiene. Apparently they want us to feel sorry for Pete Doherty

and...