Running on Empty

I wonder if it is something contagious as I don't believe it has anything to do with the time of year, not to me anyway. I am talking about running on empty and as a consequence the engine is starting to fail. Not so much fun and the feeling of absolute uselessness does nothing to help.

One of my blogger friends isn't feeling very well and neither am I. I haven't slept properly for about 10 months and it's quite a high pressured job, being a mom, and after my latest - I doubt it's the last - disgusting illness, I'm walking on the edge towards a shutdown of systems.

People say you need to rest when baby's resting and I'd love to. The only thing is that at the moment, as tired and rundown as I am, I'd probably go into a coma and not hear when Baby N wakes up so I daren't rest when he does.

A bottle leaked today and I collapsed in a sobbing heap on the kitchen floor. Pathetic, I know, but justified... I picked myself up after a few minutes and then I had to console Baby N who was terrified of the sobbing and probably horrendous looking mom with mascara streaks down her cheeks and red, runny nose. Poor little thing, he must be wishing for a mom who has a career, 5 children, writing a book, perfect make-up, spotless home and not a stain on her clothes (I find porridge in my hair!?). YOu know, the kind of moms we all read about. The Perfect Ones...

And I am sooo not one of them but I love my little Baby N more than anything, everything and everyone and that's got to count for something.

And I hope my dear blogger friend will feel better soon!

xxx